Saturday, June 27, 2009
Well May was GREAT! No news is good news...right?
On June 11th you had another ultrasound scan done.
We received it on June 12th.
All was good on it until I read the bottom..."the comment" box.
Mild Pelviectesis of left kidney noted.
Follow up at 34 weeks.
Something gutwrenching hit my stomach. Mild Pelviectasis!
All I could see was something wrong with your kidney. Fluid on the pelvis of his kidney, at least mild at this point! This was not the time to be negative. It was mild so that was good! It normally fixes itself before birth and doesn't become a problem. Or it could get worse, and once you are born there would be a pending surgery..or worse. We tried to stay positive and just see what happens.
(Pelviectasis or Fetal pelviectasis or pyelectasis typically consists of a mild enlargement of the central area, or “pelvis,” of the kidney. It's when a tube from the kidney gets kinked.) It ususally corrects itself. Praying it does.
We were worried sick though...not kidney problems. Not our little baby! All we could do was watch for the next scan..and wait! I tried not to think about it..yeah right! I couldn't wait for the next scan to see if it had cleared on its own.
One thing I did know was that Renal Pylectasis is extremely dominant in little boys ...and since Indian Law prevents the Doctor from telling Parents if it is a boy or girl ... I didn't need the Doctor to tell me now...pretty sure you are a boy. However, little girls get this too, so I couldn't be positive.
I was pretty sure though. Oh, and by the way little sweetheart, your heartrate on this scan was 132 bpm...also indicitive of a little boy. I was pretty convinced. I told your Dad what I thought...he chuckled..he thinks your Mom is pretty funny!
I will tell you that we will be thrilled for a little boy, or a little girl ... just as long as you're healthy!
I tried to keep busy, just not to think ... I must not be busy enough because I just couldn't stop thinking about it.
It's just that it's so hard not being near you, feeling you kick, thousands of miles away from you. So extremely isolating! I was ready to hop on the next plane.
Well my sweet child, May has been pretty uneventful. YaaY!
You are growing like a bad weed..lol..and Doctor Patel says that you are a big baby.
I've always had big babies..so you are my typical whopper. Usually between 8.5 and 10 pounds. They say each baby is bigger then the last, so you should be a nice big dumpling. I can't wait to hold you in my arms.
I Love You So!
Friday, June 26, 2009
We used to go crazy waiting for news of you, and our surrogate. Sometime's it just didn't seem real, especially since we lost your twin. It was so odd! Unreal, like I was in a fog. It was like after we lost your twin that our pregnancy was gone! It was like for a split second we would forget we were still pregnant. That you were growing strong in her womb, when it should have been mine. Don't get me wrong my sweet child, I am forever thankful to this beautiful lady who carried you for me. I just wanted to feel you growing inside of me.
I remember thinking of you and smiling, loving thoughts of you .. Amazing YOU!
Thriving, and giving us a reason to smile!
We were so used to the idea of being pregnant & having you and your twin that when we lost one of you...it was like losing everything..both of you..but we didn't.
Filled with sorrow...but yet so elated! It played with our minds...
We still had you! Thank God! We still had you!
We used to email Dr. Patel to check up on you...probably drove her nuts..lol.
We would get the simplest answer back.
A little frustrating, but at least we knew you were doing so well.
S is fine & resting with us.
As long as you were good and S was good..we were good too.
The next few months were a flurry of activity. We were so busy, which was so good. Kept our minds off of worry. Damned worrying! It never ends.
S & the baby are fine. Scan on 31/3/08 with a sonologist & Double Marker blood test, will send you the report.
Two Sac - Single Fetus
Comment: A Live Pregnancy.
Next up, our Double Marker blood test.
Trisomy 21 screening 1:9750
Risk for Trisomy 18 <1:10000
Low Risk for Trisomy 21 & 18
Triple Marker blood test results.
Trisomy 21 Screening.
The calculated risk for Trisomy 21 is below the cutoff which represents a low risk.
After the result of the Trisomy 21 test it is expected that more than 10,000 women with the same data there is one woman with a Trisomy 21 pregnancy
Trisomy 18 Screening.
The calculated risk for Trisomy 18 is <1:10000>
Neural Tube Defects Screening (NTD)
The corrected MoM AFP (1.38) is located in the low risk area for neural tube defects.
The calculated risk for Neural Tube Defects is 1:6128 which indicates a low risk.
WHEW!! It felt like I had been holding my breath forever. Both the Double Marker and Triple Marker blood tests were over. I know it only has around a 65% accuracy, but I was very happy with the results.
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
What a mistake! I would never do that again. It robs you of your pregnancy, your fun, your bragging rights, most of all if something goes wrong with your pregnancy..if you lose your pregnancy. It's like it never existed. It's like your child never existed! This is so wrong and very painful on so many levels.
We were having a blast! I remember my husband pulling up in front of Toys R Us and I couldn't believe it. I kept saying, "what are we doing here? I haven't been here in years!" ..but all I could do was laugh. He was so funny! We shopped til we dropped, however we only bought a few things. It was always in the back of our minds that something could go wrong. We had so much fun looking for two of everything!
When we got to the checkout there was this girl..about 20ish. I noticed a sign that said you would get a free gift if you registered in the baby department. So I asked her about it. She said after looking me over (thinking I was too old to be pregnant)...silly girl..lol. I could just read her thoughts.
She continued to say, "well, that is for the person having the baby." I said, "you mean the Mother?" She said, "yes." I said, "well then I'd like to register for my TWINS!" You can imagine the look on her face..too priceless!
Anyway, we felt like two kids in the baby department..scanning two of everything. It took us over two hours..we had so much fun. Then your Dad took me out for dinner...well I was too worn out to cook...right!
We still weren't announcing that we were pregnant..let alone twins, but did tell our immediate family, and a few close friends. Your Grandmother was thrilled! Everyone was very happy for us..and we were so happy...especially letting them hear both of your heartbeats that I taped when we called Dr. Patel at our first scan. I listen to it over and over...amazing!
Well a couple of months passed and we were sticking our toe in the waters, and starting to tell people that we were expecting twins. I just loved saying it.
At this time we were also getting ready for your Grandmothers Big Birthday! I wanted to have a special birthday for her..she is pretty amazing you know..the greatest!
On Gramma's birthday we decided to call Dr. Patel, just to see how you both were doing. To our shock they had just finished doing an ultrasound scan on our surrogate "S" and your siblings little heart had stopped beating. NO WAY!!! We just couldn't believe it...and your Dad and I couldn't stop crying. We were a complete mess...just a mess. We just couldn't figure it out. What happened! Both of you were just fine! Were we going to lose you too! We were now terrified, and mortified together. We were crushed...our hearts were crushed. I question the ultrasounds, and we told Dr. Patel that we wanted no more unnecessary scans. We were terrifed for you, little one..we just couldn't lose you too!
I prayed to God and the Virgin Mary for your safety, and to hold our little one in heaven, until I got there to hold my baby in my arms.
We kept a smile on that night, your gramma's birthday. I'm sure my eyes were so puffy, but we laughed with her. She didn't notice, and we didn't want her to know right now. We wanted nothing but love and happiness around her. This was her special day...our day of hell. If she only knew!
We didn't do well after, and waited to hear news of you...We just wanted to know that you were going to make it...to thrive! To survive! What if our surro's body started contractions? Then you would be gone too.
Time dragged. I was depressed. Your Dad was too, but I think he put on a good show for me. He is such a beautiful person.
We didn't want to be negative, but we knew that we would either lose you, or that you would thrive. It was so odd, we were grieving, but yet we were supposed to be celebrating too! It was like twisting us in two directions. We grieved your sibling, and we prayed for your life. You thrived my sweet child...thank God & the blessed Virgin Mary!
...and I shouted it from the rooftops. No matter what, I was going to celebrate this pregnancy, your beautiful life!
Sunday, June 14, 2009
After another endless two week wait we got an email from Dr. Patel.
February 22/08... Our ultrasound scan was in. It's TWINS, TWINS, TWINS...we were ecstatic..two beautiful babies coming.
The following is the email we received from Dr. Patel.
S & the twins are doing fine. scan report attatched. find out.You donot need to send the money in S's account as for that money we have to pay her food bill. All you need to do is send 1,00,000 Rs. From this we shall pay the money and S's incentive, medicine, blood tests, scans etc we shall keep the account & once it is consumed, we will ask for more.
Twins, intrauterine live pregnancy.
Two GS are seen. Heart Rate's 140 beats per minute.
Fetal pole are seen within both GS and Fetal heart sound is detected in both GS.
What a day! We called Dr. Patel and we were in our glory..God's Glory... amazing!
The first scan was in, and we were having twins. We were so happy.. just thrilled ... thrilled to be Pregnant! Now we can sleep.